There is a special relationship between fathers and daughters that I can't help but think probably foreshadows later relationships. All this said, I cannot help but marvel about the way daughters can wrap dads around their little fingers.
Case in point, shoe shopping. I thought that it would be a good idea for my husband to take my daughter to buy winter boots a couple of months ago. Now winter boots are not really an essential item especially in a season that has been sans snow, but the trip was good for bonding not to mention testing ground for the validity of any such future jaunt. When I go shoe shopping with my children we decide together on the best compromise of function and style so naturally this is what I was expecting to be the outcome of this adventure.
I waited anxiously at home for the shoppers to return that Monday evening after their expectant vanquishing of the mall foe while hoisting the prize boots in the air, triumphant. But whats this? As the troops filed in to base camp everyone exhausted but smiling, my eldest was already wearing her selection on her feet, straight out of the store. Okay, can anyone tell me why they were white, faux leather, cowboy boots with pink stitching and two inch heels? Not wanting to make a scene and undermine anyone's tastes I said to my husband through my smiling teeth, "Honey, what happened?" He replied, "thats what she said she wanted."
You know I can't fault my daughter though, because I would have pulled the same trick with my father too when I was little but needless to say, she will go shoe shopping with me in the future.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
A Birthday to Remember
Last year I did not have a traditional birthday party for my eldest, instead I opted to carry cupcakes, juice and goody bags (the parents fail safe) to school. It was a great afternoon I got to commune with her classmates and teacher, and they got a chance to act up to the unaccustomed presence in the room. It was all in great fun and I would not have changed the experience for the world.
That's where I thought it ended. To my surprise when my daughter got in the car that day she said to me, "Mummy look what I got!" Her little hands were filled with the treasures that children collect and find value in. There was an old toy cell phone with the flip part broken off, a piece of red string, a sticker (we all know that these are the currency children trade in), a purse with some of the beads lost and a pretty pencil - already sharpened halfway down! Her classmates had gifted her with all their treasured items in lieu of birthday gifts and more remarkable than that is the fact that they had done this giving spontaneously, on their own accord! Based on this experience, the innate generosity of the young and their innocent kindness has me energised and this is how I am led to believe that somehow our future will be safe.
That's where I thought it ended. To my surprise when my daughter got in the car that day she said to me, "Mummy look what I got!" Her little hands were filled with the treasures that children collect and find value in. There was an old toy cell phone with the flip part broken off, a piece of red string, a sticker (we all know that these are the currency children trade in), a purse with some of the beads lost and a pretty pencil - already sharpened halfway down! Her classmates had gifted her with all their treasured items in lieu of birthday gifts and more remarkable than that is the fact that they had done this giving spontaneously, on their own accord! Based on this experience, the innate generosity of the young and their innocent kindness has me energised and this is how I am led to believe that somehow our future will be safe.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Ash Wednesday
I admit to being very conflicted about Ash Wednesday. You see in Jamaica, Ash Wednesday is a very reflective, quiet, religious day (or so it was when I lived there). It is not uncommon to spend the entire day in six hours of church service, praying, fasting and taking communion. When I moved here I expected the same to hold. Ash Wednesday came and went before I knew it because the day was like every other day - business as usual.
Talk about culture shock. Where were the penitent church goers? Where were the churches filled to overflowing with people eager to hear the word? Some churches were not even open or if they were they did not maintain the presence that they usually do on a Sunday. But I should not behave as if there was no observation of same because I did have occasion to ride the bus and see persons come on with charcoal crosses fingerprinted on their foreheads at the intersection of their eyebrows - evidence that Christian devotion lives.
Talk about culture shock. Where were the penitent church goers? Where were the churches filled to overflowing with people eager to hear the word? Some churches were not even open or if they were they did not maintain the presence that they usually do on a Sunday. But I should not behave as if there was no observation of same because I did have occasion to ride the bus and see persons come on with charcoal crosses fingerprinted on their foreheads at the intersection of their eyebrows - evidence that Christian devotion lives.
Christmas in February
Sometimes the Spirit of Christmas transcends the holiday season and what an unexpected joy that is.
During the warmer months when I can, I like to walk my eldest to school. Its a good way for her to get the blood pumping through her veins while breathing in fresh air, getting exercise, making her mind keen for a good day at school additionally, her sister also enjoys the trek - so great! Through our walking we have become friends with the crossing guard and although she does not actually have to help us cross the street the girls pass her station and there is always a warm greeting exchanged.
"Miss M, " as our crossing guard has affectionately become known is great fun, a retired lady with grandchildren of her own who likes nothing better than hearing about her extended family of crossees school days trials and tribulations. Even when I drove to pick up my eldest, both girls always liked to run back to school crossing to say hi to Miss M but then the weather changed and it became too cold for walking so we would wave vigorously to our friend as we motored past.
Yesterday the weather was so good that I decided that we could walk again. When we came to Miss M's station she greeted us with hugs as usual but this time she also told the girls that from Christmas she had gifts for them and would bring same for them today. Oh my girls were elated! On the way to school this morning I tried to caution them "no faces if there is not a gift this morning I think Miss M means to bring them this afternoon." But no need! As we turned the corner Miss M put down her sign and brought two little gift bags that really looked as if the had been waiting from christmas for the girls. I wondered what we could do for Miss M in return but then I remembered a sage little person once told me ..."they did give me gifts, they gave me hugs."
During the warmer months when I can, I like to walk my eldest to school. Its a good way for her to get the blood pumping through her veins while breathing in fresh air, getting exercise, making her mind keen for a good day at school additionally, her sister also enjoys the trek - so great! Through our walking we have become friends with the crossing guard and although she does not actually have to help us cross the street the girls pass her station and there is always a warm greeting exchanged.
"Miss M, " as our crossing guard has affectionately become known is great fun, a retired lady with grandchildren of her own who likes nothing better than hearing about her extended family of crossees school days trials and tribulations. Even when I drove to pick up my eldest, both girls always liked to run back to school crossing to say hi to Miss M but then the weather changed and it became too cold for walking so we would wave vigorously to our friend as we motored past.
Yesterday the weather was so good that I decided that we could walk again. When we came to Miss M's station she greeted us with hugs as usual but this time she also told the girls that from Christmas she had gifts for them and would bring same for them today. Oh my girls were elated! On the way to school this morning I tried to caution them "no faces if there is not a gift this morning I think Miss M means to bring them this afternoon." But no need! As we turned the corner Miss M put down her sign and brought two little gift bags that really looked as if the had been waiting from christmas for the girls. I wondered what we could do for Miss M in return but then I remembered a sage little person once told me ..."they did give me gifts, they gave me hugs."
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Super Tuesday
What a fantastic day in the history of the democratic process yesterday was!! At the end of the day, a woman and a black man were locked in a dead heat for the democratic party of the United States of America, presidential nomination - Wow!! If in 1900 the idea of the possibility of this event happening was told to the average American I am sure they would have laughed shamelessly. Because look at it, women did not vote until 1920 and the voting rights act was passed in 1965; so conceiveably a person 90 years old could have witnessed all this change in one lifetime!
Yesterday just had an air of it being an important day. The temperature was mild and sunny, people were happy and pleasant, change was in the atmosphere. In New York City there was the Super Bowl winners parade for the New York Giants, fashion week and last minute electionairing and in New Orleans, across the Christian community it was the eve of the beginning of Lent and the other half of the world's population were celebrating Chinese New Year, everyone had something going on - the energy was crackling it was as if you in your quiet existance were standing at the corner of the world watching it rotate.
In my household, my little ones were enthralled with Barack Obama because he looked like them. My six year old became interested in the process and if a candidacy can do that, it must be alright. That is not to say that there weren't factions such as what split the possibilty of a candidate getting the nod in the democratic party here in this home, there were and as a microcosim of the greater sentiment we were split in our loyaltys in the same way the vote was. But we still love and respect each others right to have differing views and still as one were amazed at the process, united going forward - just as how I believe the democratic party will be regardless of who gets the nomination.
Right now I'm documenting history for my girls - How cool is that?
Yesterday just had an air of it being an important day. The temperature was mild and sunny, people were happy and pleasant, change was in the atmosphere. In New York City there was the Super Bowl winners parade for the New York Giants, fashion week and last minute electionairing and in New Orleans, across the Christian community it was the eve of the beginning of Lent and the other half of the world's population were celebrating Chinese New Year, everyone had something going on - the energy was crackling it was as if you in your quiet existance were standing at the corner of the world watching it rotate.
In my household, my little ones were enthralled with Barack Obama because he looked like them. My six year old became interested in the process and if a candidacy can do that, it must be alright. That is not to say that there weren't factions such as what split the possibilty of a candidate getting the nod in the democratic party here in this home, there were and as a microcosim of the greater sentiment we were split in our loyaltys in the same way the vote was. But we still love and respect each others right to have differing views and still as one were amazed at the process, united going forward - just as how I believe the democratic party will be regardless of who gets the nomination.
Right now I'm documenting history for my girls - How cool is that?
Monday, February 4, 2008
Rocketships and Teaparties
My youngest is a child with an enlightening dichotomy of interests. She actively wants to build rockships with her legos and entertain with her Dora teaparty set. Amazing! I remember when I was little I was spent most of my time on skateboards but I always had that special pink party dress that I had to wear on every special occasion. She is a chip off the chipper young block - the saying as it pertains to old is not me .
We went to the Philadelphia Museum of Art on the weekend (the place with those awesome stairs that Sylvester Stallone ran up in the original Rocky movie). One of the exhibits was set up as if it was a Spanish courtyard and at its center sat a functioning water fountain. Now a curious tradition that I have noticed which Americans have is that wherever there is a standing body of water in a decorative enclosure, they throw money ala wishing well. (Can you imagine how many diving Jamaicans there would be if that tradition existed ah yard?) My children brought their own coins so suffice to say they threw hard earned money into the fountain and made wishes.
My oldest knows the drill, she wished quietly to herself. My youngest was thrilled to be able to participate in the tradition on her own for the first time. She grinned and tossed her money in the fountain and with surprising reverence for the surroundings she whispered, " I wish I could be an Astronaut and fly a real rocketship!" This wish floored me! I suddenly thought that maybe this is how life's ambitions start. Wow!! Should I be looking into science programs, trying to build her math abilities, showing her what little physics I know, thinking about flying lessons when she's older? Will this ambition change? Is it one of many she will have? One thing is for sure I have to start speaking about college more in this house for whatever she wants to be I intend to be able to facilitate it.
We went to the Philadelphia Museum of Art on the weekend (the place with those awesome stairs that Sylvester Stallone ran up in the original Rocky movie). One of the exhibits was set up as if it was a Spanish courtyard and at its center sat a functioning water fountain. Now a curious tradition that I have noticed which Americans have is that wherever there is a standing body of water in a decorative enclosure, they throw money ala wishing well. (Can you imagine how many diving Jamaicans there would be if that tradition existed ah yard?) My children brought their own coins so suffice to say they threw hard earned money into the fountain and made wishes.
My oldest knows the drill, she wished quietly to herself. My youngest was thrilled to be able to participate in the tradition on her own for the first time. She grinned and tossed her money in the fountain and with surprising reverence for the surroundings she whispered, " I wish I could be an Astronaut and fly a real rocketship!" This wish floored me! I suddenly thought that maybe this is how life's ambitions start. Wow!! Should I be looking into science programs, trying to build her math abilities, showing her what little physics I know, thinking about flying lessons when she's older? Will this ambition change? Is it one of many she will have? One thing is for sure I have to start speaking about college more in this house for whatever she wants to be I intend to be able to facilitate it.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Her Legacy Continues
My niece at nineteen, was far more powerful in life than I in my many years on this earth have ever been. To know her, the first thing one noticed was her tall willowy beauty. But then one would been taken by how unassuming and humble she was. She had a way of walking and looking at her toes in a very unsure manner which kind of served as a protective mechanism as if she expected not to be liked at first impression, it just endeared her more to you and made you want to protect her. For those who encountered her and did not get the chance to know her what a treat they missed. For those who did know her I'm sure they'll agree that we were among a blessed few.
She has been gone for ten months now but her mother (my hero) has selflessly chosen to share her daughter's light with the world. She has formed a foundation appropriately named Transforming America Through Interaction or TATI as my niece Tatiana was known - to mentor young people in at risk communities, a task that Tatiana herself was elbow deep in at the time of her passing. I am so proud.
http://myspectaculartati.com/
She has been gone for ten months now but her mother (my hero) has selflessly chosen to share her daughter's light with the world. She has formed a foundation appropriately named Transforming America Through Interaction or TATI as my niece Tatiana was known - to mentor young people in at risk communities, a task that Tatiana herself was elbow deep in at the time of her passing. I am so proud.
http://myspectaculartati.com/
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